Blonde Ambition

Monday morning started out as any other day for my family. I woke up and got dressed and the girls and I headed out the door to their dentist appointments. I was sitting in between appointments in the children's play area, and the Lord brought Leslie upon my mind. 

For those of you who don't know Leslie, she was the blogger behind A Blonde Ambition. We first met at Arkansas State University, where she had pledge Alpha Gam. We were sorority sisters. Leslie was three years behind me in school and through our sorority, she became my Great-Grand Lil Sis. By that time in my life, I was really focused on school and I didn't get to know Leslie that well. 

When she began blogging, I don't even remembered how I stumbled upon her blog, but I was a reader from the beginning. I loved her fashion sense, I loved her spirit, she was witty and charming and beautiful and it was evident every day that I clicked over to read her blog. 

When she hosted her first giveaway, I entered and won a scarf. It was right around the time that scarves became more of an accessory rather than a must have for a cold winter's day. I still have that scarf.

Through her blog, I was with her when she ended a serious relationship, had single days, and met Stephen (her husband). I watched their engagement, their wedding, her pregnancies and finally the birth of their first child, Caroline. Adalyn was born just a few months before Caroline and I felt like we were pregnant together. Except, Leslie pulled it off way better than I did. She was glowing throughout. And, she was wearing heals. I was always envious that she was still able to wear heals! Ha! 

A few months after Caroline was born, maybe 6 or so. She announced that she was expecting again! I think I was horrified for her that she'd have babies so close together, but Leslie was excited! Her attitude about having another baby, so close to her first, was just mind-blowing. She was going to face it head on with tons of anticipation and love. 

She wasn't blogging as much when Caroline was a baby. Having a baby is exhausting. Having a baby and being pregnant again, well, I can't even imagine. Leslie however, was glowing. Her face, her smile, her happiness was shining bright through my computer screen. 

Her second daughter, Ainsley was born this past December. I was thrilled for her. 

Sadly, in February, Leslie reported that she was in the hospital because she was having heart issues. She shared previously that she had heart issues as a child. And now that heart was failing her again. 

As many people did, I prayed for her and finally in May, she was able to come home. 

I felt so sad that Leslie had missed so much with her babies. My heart broke for her, and honestly, I can't imagine what that must have felt like. When she got home in May, she began blogging again, and I was so excited that she was back. Again, the love for her family was exuded through her blog, through her facebook, her instagram. I felt so happy for her.

Then, the news came that she was being readmitted to the hospital. God layed her on my heart and I went over to check her blog. I was fully expecting another witty Confessional Friday, and instead I learned that she was  being flown to Cleveland and something was going to have to be done about her heart.  I headed over to her Facebook to let her know that I was praying for her, thinking about her. And, I'm so glad that I did. I really think that God put her on my heart for a reason. 

Fast forward to our dentist appointments on Monday, and Leslie was put on my heart again. I checked her blog and there was no update. The girls and I came home, and I received a message that Leslie had passed away in her sleep that night. Heart broken. 

You see, she has a husband and two babies who she has left behind. She has her parents, her friends, so many people who love her. I think if you even knew Leslie a little bit, you couldn't help but to fall in love with her. Her personality was just glowing. My heart breaks for her two girls. My heart breaks for her husband. 

My biggest fear as a mother is leaving my children behind. 

I know that Leslie is in heaven. She spoke about her faith often in her blog. I have peace knowing that so many of her loved ones will see her again. But, my heart is still breaking for her children. 

I began going about my daily routines Monday morning, after I had received the news, and through tears, I thought, what on earth can I do. How can I help these little girls know their mother. I decided to start a letter writing campaign.

See, when I was pregnant with Gretchen, my biggest fear was leaving her behind, knowing that she may not know me. I began to write her letters to have when she got older. My letters eventually turned into my blog, and I'm grateful that my girls will have my blog to look back on. I'm even more grateful that Caroline and Ainsley will have their mother's blog to look back on. 

I couldn't get the idea out of my head to write a letter to Caroline and Ainsley. Telling them how much their mother meant to me. Telling them what an amazing person she was! If you knew Leslie, I'm asking that you write a letter to the girls too. 

My hopes are that as these girls grow, and move through their life, they'll have glimpses of their mother. Sadly, she won't be their for their first kiss, she won't be their for their first date, prom dress shopping, their graduations, their engagments, or their weddings. 

Those are the times that I would want my mother. The times that these girls can pull out their letters and see your words. Maybe you want to share advice, maybe you want to share a Bible verse, a funny story- anything to give these girls glimpses of the wonderful person that their mother was. 

If you would like to participate in the Sisti Sisters Letters Campaign, please send me an email at elainewelte@gmail.com with Sisti Sisters Letters in the subject line. I will send you the information to where you can mail your letter. Once the letters have been received, I will place them in a keepsake box and forward them to Stephen where he can hold on to them for the girls.

I'm not even sure how to wrap this up, other than, asking you to please pray for her family. Pray for her husband that he will have strength to raise these two precious girls. Pray for these girls that they will know the love their mother had for life. She loved life so. I'm thankful they'll have her blog to look back on. 

If you don't know Jesus, I pray that you will come to know him. I would love to talk to you about Jesus, and Heaven and ever lasting life. 

Leslie's was a life cut too short.

As Leslie always said, "Be Blessed Lovelies"